Turn the Page

I love Bob Segar... But wait, I haven't mentioned my sister Melinda. She was like a mother to me when I was a child. She had a rough life. Having been abused as a child, she was spiritually scarred and confused, but she loved me and I loved her.

Melinda took me to see Bob Segar in concert one summer he came to San Antonio. I remember driving the hour down I 10 in her old black Chevy pick up, with no air conditioning. I didn't care. Very few cars I rode in in those days had AC. It was the time of my life. I knew Melinda loved me. I felt it. No matter how rough she was or unacceptable to proper society, she was acceptable to me. She had done everything bad a person might think of. She was the person who introduced me to pot and wine coolers. She didn't know she was hurting me. She was trying to draw me closer to her. I don't fault her for any of it. Standing with her and singing and crying listening to Bob Segar live was an amazing, unforgettable experience. "Janie was lovely. She was the queen of my night, there in the darkness with the radio playing low. Against the wind. We were running against the wind. We were young and strong and we were running... against the wind." I love those lyrics.

"Turn the Page" was Melinda's favorite. She also turned me on to the Eagles, Led Zeppelin, Simon and Garfunkel, Boston, and Journey, to name some. That music always makes me think of her. I think of her every day. I miss her.

Melinda was killed by a drunk driver in 1989 on St. Patrick's Day. The young man who killed her was on leave from the Army he had just joined. He wasn't even old enough to drink alcohol in the State of Texas at that time. He took a mother away from a 14 year old daughter. He took a daughter away from a grieving mother. He took my sister away from me.

I know, because of the testimony I have of the Gospel of Jesus Christ, that families can be together forever. I look forward to the time I will be reunited with my sister. I like to imagine she may, over these years, have been able to spend some time in the spirit world with my own daughter Heather, who died in infancy in 1990. Melinda, too, had a daughter who died of phneumochoccal meningitis (I should find the correct spelling of this disease).

Carrie was only 14 months old when she died. Melinda was with her as she cried 'Mama' repeatedly until she lapsed into a coma. It was devastating for my sister. The IV antibiotic leaked out of the baby's catheter and into her diaper. The nurse thought the baby was wetting her diaper. Carrie wasn't getting the medication needed to save her life. By the time they found out what was going on, it was too late.

Carrie's death was one dark moment in Melinda's life. Her life was like a landscape of darkness with droplets of color. So much of her time on earth was sadness...so much so, that it was hard for her to feel the joy when it did come. Some of her pain was induced by molesting adults in her childhood. Some was self imposed as she grew. Such is the sad pattern of young girls who are abused. They often self-abuse, thus insuring they continue to hurt, often for the duration of their mortal lives. They drink alcohol in excess, they sell their virtue, they find men who will hurt them, they hurt people... It is heartbreaking.

I have been grateful over the years that Melinda is free from the pains of this world, although I miss her still. I don't believe she has ceased to exist. I believe the story of her life continues as a story written in the pages of a never ending story book. The page has turned for her. And though, I'm not on the same page, I will be, one of these days.

One of these days we will all be on the same page. The time will come when all nations, kindreds, tongues and people will confess the same truths. The time will come when every knee shall bow and every tongue confess the same truth. When all eyes shall see, every ear shall hear and every heart shall feel...

Until that time comes, we are all somewhere on our own page in our own book... turning pages. No matter one's station or season in life, it too soon is time to turn the page.

When darkness and despair loom like clouds upon the horizon, remember the wind will soon blow in from the north. Clouds are slaves to the wind.

If the darkness is too heavy and no joy can be found in the cool breeze and temporary shade of the clouds, at least remain hopeful, for on the next page, there is reason to rejoice. All earthly stories end in a measure of happily ever after.

"In my Father's house are many mansions. If it were not so, I would have told you."

And they lived happily ever after... turn the page...