Life Cycles

Someone asked how I teach my children truth. It’s simple: just show and tell. I’d say show and tell is the best way to teach anything to anyone. Sometimes, the tell part comes first, then the showing, but the most important life lessons are learned from examples set, long before we have words to tell what we’ve been learning all along… One of our girls is involved in competitive weightlifting. Her personal trainer is experienced and has been a successful competitor in powerlifting, himself. Because of this, she trusts his judgement and tries to follow his counsel. She has witnessed him lifting very heavy weights in the same manner as he tries to encourage her, and she puts forth increased effort when he yells, “Don’t you drop that bar once you get your hands on it! You got this! If you drop that bar…” I won’t finish the quote. Suffice it to say, she interprets his message to mean he knows she can do more than she is afraid she can’t. She has found out he’s right. She believes in him, so she believes more in herself because of that. He has shown her he knows the way so she listens to what he tells her and follows his counsel. A precious friend of mine feels increased confidence in her ability to develop strength and to approach a healthier weight. She knows I’ve given birth to nine children, that I’ve struggled with my weight since I was a child, and that I weighed 297lbs when my last child was two years-old. Almost ten years ago, I began a journey that brought me to where I am (still a work in progress, as we all are and always will be), and she sees the proof of what I say to her. She sees where I am and that helps her believe me when I tell her she can get here, too, and how to do it. Show and tell is powerfully effective when it comes to kindness and respect. I was recently privileged to spend a day in the company of dozens of teenagers (substituting for one of the high school teachers). Notwithstanding the enthusiasm, I didn’t need to raise my voice during the entire day, but only enjoyed the intellectual challenge and the opportunity to interact with many choice youths in our community. I told one class that I appreciate respectful children and teenagers as much as the next person. I understand, though, that I cannot hope to be respected by my children if I haven’t first been kind and respectful to them (like show and tell). One student respectfully suggested I share this idea with other adults… Be well.